Initiation Parenthood – Ritual – Responsibility as a Mother and as a Father
Initiation into parenthood: The phoenix must rise from the ashes to grow into the new role as father or mother. The old must die, so that one can assume new responsibility. Women naturally deal with death and their own transience when they give birth to their child. The pain at birth giving is necessary for the women to be reborn as a mother.
Therefore, in order to become an equal family, men must actively seek this experience. Face pain and death to grow up. Both must face death and impermanence, respectively, so that the body and mind can learn the difference between pain and suffering. This creates responsibility and the core of the family. You become part of something bigger in body and mind.
One who conquers himself is greater than one who conquers a thousand in battle.
Men
The initiation into the father role begins with a mountain week at the Honora Zen monastery.
Women
For women, initiation into the role of mother begins when they give birth naturally.
Contemplation - Parenthood - Family
The victorious and the three jewels, my great refuge, are my crown jewels of great happiness. I pray from my heart never to be separated from these. Keep holding me with the iron hook of your compassion.
I lovingly keep the teachings of my kind parents. What good is verbal freedom if you don't untie the knot of avarice? What is the use of feigning discipline if one does not abandon deceit and falsehood? What is the use of patience practiced for the sake of reputation if one cannot endure the weapons of hurtful words? What's the use of superficially striving for positive action if you don't really get over your laziness?
What is the use of enduring difficulties in practice if one does not give up one's absent-mindedness? What is the use of meditating on openness, the wisdom aspect, if one does not experience appearances as helpful? What good is extensive knowledge if you don't understand the profound core point? What's the use of explaining the law of cause and effect to others if you don't act according to it yourself?
Until one has killed the venomous snake of disturbed emotions, it is false to claim that they are primal consciousness. Until the whirlwind of jealousy subsides, it is false to claim to be practicing the enlightenment mindset. As long as one has not overcome the ego illusion, it is wrong to claim that one understands the equality of things. As long as a master has not tamed the demon of egoism, he is ruled by the three poisons.
Zen Order of Switzerland